Behind The Scenes Of Starting A Family – Chapter 5: Telling The Parents
If you haven’t started at Chapter 1 of the adventure, I recommend that you check it out–if nothing else to get to know me a little bit and figure out where we’re at on the journey to start our family. Now that your caught up, let’s continue on.
How Do We Do It?
So we already knew that we want to tell people in-person, cause that’s how we roll, but the more specifics of how were still up for debate. Do we wrap the pregnancy test up like a gift and make them open it? Do we wait the entire month and give each of our dads a father’s day card that says grandpa? Do we just keep it casual when they inevitably ask why I am not drinking wine? Or do we make it some elaborate setup that we secretly film? Hmm. All the ideas were flowing…
Who Gets To Know First?
His family lives in town, whereas mine all live several hours away. My parents would totally spill the beans to my grandparents, but they also know how to keep their mouths shut to the rest, when requested. Case and point: our engagement. And apparently his family is worse at keeping secrets than mine, so we thought about a communal diner, but asking them all to dine together when my parents are visiting would be a dead-giveaway, we had to forego that one. We decided on trusting my parents with the secret for a little while, until we have the opportunity to share with his.
Which meant that technically the health care practitioners got to find out first. Also, did you know that your baby is roughly 2 weeks older than you’ve been pregnant. Apparently because the egg was released & fertilized which started creating the embryo, almost two weeks before implanting into the uterus. So by the time you actually become pregnant, your fetus is already a couple weeks along. So in reality–technically speaking–pregnancies are only 37 weeks. Yeah, of course the numbers person I am would focus on that. Anyway…
How Did It Play Out?
I decided to have a custom shirt made for my dad for Father’s Day, but instead of dad it said grandpa. I like to make people think, make them work for it. So I had my mom sitting at the other end of the table, because I wanted her to see his reaction, cause let’s face it–she isn’t always the speediest riddle-cracker. I had Alex on camera-duty while my dad opened his gift, and I am thrilled that he was able to capture my dad’s face when he put the two and two together! I just wish he had gotten my mom’s after the shirt was turned around where she could read it. Pure shock. But in a good way, of course. My dad actually had to muster the courage through the tears to ask if he could wear the shirt to breakfast the next day (we were meeting up with more family). I had called it–my dad would be the one to cry. And there is no shame in that!
With Alex’s dad it was a little less dramatic since we didn’t have an elaborate plan–he likes to keep things simple and straightforward. A cold drink on a sunny afternoon after work seemed like the perfect time, and regardless of the way it was said, he and his wife were just as excited for us.
As for Alex’s mom, we actually ended up having HER unknowingly bring the prop for this reveal. I had gotten a bag from one of the online babywearing buy-sell groups and the pickup was a quick walk from her house so we had her bring it downtown for diner. We knew that she’d ask what it was going to be used for–I am not the only curious one in the group! And sure enough, she did, and we got to tell her that it was intended to be used as a diaper bag. The second she realized it was for OUR baby (and not for my business), out came the waterworks. Happy tears of course!
I am very pleased to say that it’s been several weeks and so far, nobody has ruined the surprise for any one else. By the time we were able to tell my grandparents, we had our first dating ultrasound, so we actually had a “photo” to show them. The intention was to hide it until a few days into our vacation up north (we took advantage of a pre-planned road trip up to Kapuskasing to tell them), so that we could include the ultrasound photo in their happy 60th anniversary card as their “gift”–a great grandchild, but we could wait that long. We gave them their card early, and I am happy to say the news was very well received. Turns out she had never seen one before, so she was very excited to share with everyone.
Aaaaaand, I now can finally stop wearing super baggy shirts! Onto the next adventure…
Ready for the next chapter? Here’s to continuing on the roller coaster of parenthood! Read on to Chapter 6.