30 Things to know about being married to a Newborn Photographer
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30 Things to know about being married to a Newborn Photographer

30 Things to know about being married to a Newborn Photographer

A fellow photographer posted an article about being married to a wedding photographer this morning, but since I focus on newborns and births, I decided to compose a fabulous list for all you out there like myself who just couldn’t complete relate to it. In collaboration with Krista from over at Simply Newborn Art, these are some of the things we came up with, as well as a few originals.

  1. Her work wardrobe consists of yoga pants and tank tops. Maybe some cute jeggings, but unlikely.
  2. You won’t be surprised to hear that she got pooped on at work.. again!
  3. Your laundry room will frequently smell of baby pee, even if you don’t have kids or pets.
  4. She will constantly be doing laundry, yet you will both complain of never having clean clothes.
    Tip: Do NOT think you are doing her a favour by washing her blankets and props. You WILL regret it!
  5. You won’t be alarmed if you find men’s clothes in the laundry that aren’t yours.. They are for her daddy clients.
  6. She will spend most of her time in front of a computer.
  7. Get used to her coming to bed at 3 am.
  8. It may look like she’s  just wasting time on her computer in pj’s watching Grey’s Anatomy, but she IS editing. I swear!
  9. You won’t even bat an eye when you see her staring for hours at countless images shirtless men.. It’s inspiration, or editing. Promise!
  10. Finally, a perk: You will never have to check the mail because she will always bring it in hoping you won’t see her prop stash accumulating..
  11. ..However, you will slowly notice an ever-growing collection of baskets and buckets and blankets.. that you are NOT allowed to use.
  12. You can’t go shopping without her buying everything she can fit a baby into, or wrap a baby in.
    Tip: Don’t bother trying to stop her. She will just go back later if you do.
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  13. Thinking of borrowing her camera for a quick something? Think again!
  14. Don’t bother asking if you can borrow anything from her studio stash, the answer is probably going to be no. And don’t even think about the “I’ll use it, wash it, and put it back and she’ll never know” scenario. SHE WILL KNOW!
  15. Your wife coming home with bags of misc. baby items (diapers, wipes, etc.) or maternity gear won’t make you suspicious of a pregnancy. It’s for her clients. You know her pregnancy announcement will be EPIC so no use panicking over nothing.
  16. Your will learn to tune out the baby fever talk, and the constant staring at babies and pregnant bellies in public.
  17. She will see more boobs in a month than you will in a lifetime.
  18. Another perk: Home-studio means house will always be clean.. except for the few hours the hurricane that is a newborn session happens!
  19. ..However your house will be 30 degrees every time she has a client over, and the heat bill will be ridiculous, even in the summer.
  20. ..Oh, and you will loose at least one room to being the studio & storage. Guaranteed.
  21. If she’s got any inclination of DIY, be ready to find half-finished craft or knitting projects throughout the house.
  22. If YOU have any inclination of being handy, be ready to build her all sorts of cool props and backdrops!
  23. If you have un-used space in the backyard, be prepared for it to become a mini flowery field setup perfect for a newborn photography backdrop.
  24. You won’t be surprised to see that the lovely sweater you saw her come home with last week very much resembles that little raggedy blanket, pants or hat in her most recent photos.. Don’t question it.wait-what-gif
  25. Be ready to learn the foreign language of flokati, froggy, merino, taco, aperture, etc. or to simply nod and smile.
  26. You will have many opportunities to listen to her rant about crazy inquiries, fauxtographers, and the dreaded tax time.
  27. Your walls and/or fridge will be covered with images of babies, even if you don’t have any of your own, and you probably will have no idea who they are.
  28. Be ready to have yourself photographed a million times, but only see a few images if any, and yes they will be retouched before posted online whether you like it or not. Often they will be in the “I need to test something, stand there and look pretty” scenario.
  29. If you notice her rocking back and forth for no reason at all. She’s fine.. for now.
  30. Yes, you WILL walk into the room to find her doing some pretty weird things, like trying on maternity gowns with her shirt stuffed with blankets, or practicing posing or lighting with teddy bears or dolls, or just taking a dancing break..
    Tip: Just walk away..
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BONUS: If she also photographs births.. You will enjoy the entire bed to yourself some nights (or early mornings) when she runs off to photograph a birth. But only after the lights and various sounds have woken you up of course!

BUT the best perk of all? She will be doing something she absolutely LOVES so she will be one happy camper! ..most of the time.

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27 Comments

  • Love it and how very true x

    August 26, 2014 at 5:32 PM
  • That’s so right on, lol!

    August 26, 2014 at 5:41 PM
  • Lol! So so true! Great list!

    August 26, 2014 at 6:24 PM
  • Grace Nelson

    Reply

    Newborns/wee babies will always steal my heart! I love what you are doing, Nicole, and always will!

    August 26, 2014 at 11:55 PM
  • This is so true! A great post 🙂

    August 27, 2014 at 11:01 PM
  • Very funny, and very true! xx

    August 27, 2014 at 11:35 PM
  • I absolutely love this!!! It was awesome and sooooo true!!

    September 18, 2014 at 2:52 PM
  • Great list – and so true! Being a newborn photographer adds so much to the everyday norm!

    September 18, 2014 at 2:55 PM
  • This is so funny! I absolutely love how I can relate to all of it. From one newborn photographer to another, isn’t it the best job ever!? You are such a talented photographer and if I ever know of anyone looking for newborn photography in Gatineau, I will send them your way!

    September 18, 2014 at 3:48 PM
  • I’m sure my husband can definitely relate to your blog post about being married to a newborn photographer! 🙂

    September 18, 2014 at 6:06 PM
  • I love your list! Being a newborn and birthing photographer takes patience and a love of children. Your images are outstanding and you are able to capture those first moments of parenthood and life.

    September 18, 2014 at 6:54 PM
  • This is such a funny list! Thanks for the laughs! Being a newborn photographer has it’s perks, lol

    September 18, 2014 at 7:58 PM
  • Wendy Atkins

    Reply

    Oh dear, your partner must be very patient! Still at least you love your job as a newborn photographer.

    September 18, 2014 at 10:49 PM
  • Omg I laughed at everyone one of these because they are SO TRUE! Awesome post!

    September 19, 2014 at 8:16 AM
  • What a a great list! Gave me a chuckle. 🙂

    September 19, 2014 at 10:01 AM
  • This list had me laughing from start to end! Great compilation!

    September 19, 2014 at 1:05 PM
  • Michelle M

    Reply

    This is so true! After my newborn session the other day I went to change and decided to just leave the yoga pants on they were far more comfortable.

    September 19, 2014 at 2:33 PM
  • Michelle M

    Reply

    This is the life a newborn photographer!!

    September 19, 2014 at 2:34 PM
  • This is so true the life of a newborn photographer.

    September 19, 2014 at 2:35 PM
  • This article is hilarious and so dead on accurate. My bff sent it to me and I just died laughing reading it! Great read!! 🙂

    September 20, 2014 at 10:31 AM
  • Jennifer

    Reply

    I laughed so hard at this, I never sat and thought about all that was going into my day I just did it! While reading this I was like yup yup to funny! Definitely a great ready for any photographer thinking of being a newborn photographer! There is so much dedication to the job!

    September 20, 2014 at 1:43 PM
  • This is so true! I bet my husband would agree with all of the above

    September 20, 2014 at 1:57 PM
  • Great post on newborn photography information. That last newborn photo is so incredibly cute

    September 20, 2014 at 10:15 PM
  • These are all funny and very true! I love how you summed it up with the photo of the smiling newborn baby…like he thinks it is all funny too!

    September 23, 2014 at 1:43 PM
  • Darwin

    Reply

    I think that your page can go viral easily! This is hilarious!

    September 25, 2014 at 3:03 PM
  • Yes, time has come to start a baby photographers’ anonymous group but this organization will be for photographer spouses only. There may not be hope for all the dreadfully addicted baby photographers but at least this way there will be for their spouses.

    April 5, 2015 at 5:33 PM

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